Twelve- Pigs Can't Fly (But Bulldogs Can)

What a bloody journey,

After a lovely, but busy, three weeks back in Korea, the boxes were shipped, the dog was vaccinated, Barry's grave was visited and the friends were said goodbye to. Thank you so much to Chris and Carla for taking care of our little girl for the past 5 months.






I had an amazing time with Sarah who kept me company most days and will be truly missed- thank you for the drunken escapades. Also, Dave, Ali, Jess, Oliver, Phil, Nick, Peter and Deborah- keep in touch.







Anyway, on the last day, Pinky and I went to say goodbye to Chris at work, and Pinky's new friend- the British Ambassador's wife- yes, our bulldog had become friends with the ambassador whilst we were away. So off we went for a walk in the embassy grounds.




After a tearful goodbye and a frantic taxi journey with Pinky in her first ever car ride we arrived at Incheon airport two and a half hours before we flew. Had problems with the taxi driver who wanted more money but I just said no and ran (as fast as one can run with a dog, three suitcases, two sets of pool sticks and a fishing rod)

Got into the airport. Went to the front of the queue because pinky was having a tantrum in her crate and I wasn't standing in line for half an hour with that going on. Got to the desk. Was told that I had to go to quarantine, which I already knew, and that the fishing rod and pool sticks would cost $230 each. Had a row about the fishing rod, holding it above my head saying "It doesn't even weigh a pound, how can it be that price, how.......pleeeeeeassseeee!". He laughed at me and then let me off with the rod for free.

He then told me that I had twenty mins to get my quarantine papers before the gate closed. I ran with pinky on a trolley to the quarantine office, filled in lots of paperwork very fast and then ran back with two mins to spare. Took the dog to oversized baggage. Done. I then had 40 mins to get to the other terminal to board but I also had pool sticks to get rid of. I took them to the post office who wouldn't take them. Ran to the other side of the airport and launched them at the hanjin tek bae man saying "I'll pay extra, just be quick, here's the address, I'm off". Got to the plane 10 mins before it departed.

I've been on hundreds of flights but this one by far had the worst turbulance of any and I sat the whole way there in a crazed panic thinking of Pinky and the other 6 dogs in the hold freaking out. (all the other dogs were flat nosed too- it was two days before the deadline to fly snub nosed dogs because of the heat).

So I arrived in San Fransico with two hours to get my next flight. I had to go through immigration who questioned me for 20 mins about why I was here three weeks ago and coming back, I eventually got let in when he said "So why would you teach English in England, everyone already speaks English". I wanted to say " Well in that case give me a visa for the USA and I can teach English to the 300 non English speaking Koreans that you just let through." but instead, I stuck with "well there are a lot of immigrants in london".

Had to collect my luggage, go to overszed baggage to collect the rod, go to quarantine to collect the dog and then check them all in again. Got to the baggage check in and they said I was too late and that I needed to get the next flight. Got to the desk and found out that the next flight was in 11 hours. Great. She took my bags but couldn't take the dog so Pinky and I spent our time between a "pet relief area" and a quiet corner by a baggage carousel. As they wouldn't let me take the dog food through customs, Pinky had a very unhealty feast of a Subway meatball sandwich (Don't judge me, I had to make the best out of my limited resources, I'm like Bear Grills frankly). I by this point was exhausted but couldn't sleep because Pinky wanted to come out of the crate. So I took her out and we both curled up on the floor and had a nap. She made lots of friends at baggage carousel number 3, including Jose the Mexican courier. Dee, the beautiful Prada wearing, Pomeranian owning, girl from Israel, Cara a six year old from Mississippi and many many others.



Three hours before the flight I decided that Pinky was probably better off being checked in so that I could get some sleep and she would stop whining. I took her back to quarantine, where everybody loved her and then I went to my gate and slept a very deep sleep this time with the luxury of a chair to sleep on. Got on the next plane and gave the stewardess my note to the pilot about the temperate the dog needed to have in the hold and he wrote me one back saying "Pinky is onboard and doing well, I went to see her before I got on board myself and she's great, sleep well and don't worry. G.Liggard". I thought that was nice. As shocking as this trip has been due to aiports, the United staff have all been amazing.

Arrived at Washington DC realising that I didn't quite know if it was Wed, Thu or Fri and thought that in my hour I had until the next flight, I would have a wash, get changed and brush my teeth. As I was standing there with a wet face and toothpaste dripping off my chin, I heard "Can Emily Ingham report immediately to Gate D30".
Went to the gate and due to my pessimistic ways said "has the dog died?" "No the dog is fine, she's having some food, but you need to go down and let them inspect her again because San Fran forgot to give her some paperwork". A manager came and ran with me to the quarantine office which was outside next to the planes. Went in and the officer said "Oh yeah, Pinky is already getting on the Plane, we usually have to have the owner there in case the pet is vicious but Pinky was fine so we just did the checks ourself. I then got shoved onto a truck and driven to the plane that was about to leave. As I was getting on I heard the baggage handlers shout "yay Pinky, have a great flight". I said "Is she ok" and they replied " yeah she's fine, we've been playing with her for ages, Pinky is so cool,". Hilarous.



Anyway we eventually arrived in Atlanta, as did the baggage. Pinky was very happy to see Shawn and we took her to a big field and she bounded around loking very... doglike. I felt quite emotional seeing her on grass like dogs should be, she looked so excited, the whole trip seemed worthwhile.

She likes her new house. She snuggled into the gap between Shawn and I last night, lay on her back, paws in the air and slept with a very loud contented snore. I think she's happy.




Em xxx

Eleven- Sweet Home Atlanta

I’m writing this at 30,000 ft, somewhere over Alaska. (But obviously I will send it when I land) After deciding to stay in the USA, I am going to Korea to collect the dog and our stuff whilst Shawn, looks for a job in Atlanta.

I think the last time I got in touch was in Boston. Boston was freezing so we left to go to Houston. On the flight from the UK to Boston we had briefly stopped in New York and Shawn had promised me that he would take me back there. So before we left for Houston, we spent 3 days in New Jersey with Shawn’s very cool Aunt Vicki and Uncle Ed and their incredibly cute little boys Jonathan and Robert.



Vicki and Ed then drove us to New York city which was the best view from a car window I have ever seen.






Shawn and I stayed in a hotel three blocks away from the Empire State building, amazing view. I spent the entire three days in New York speaking in “Oooooooohhhhs, Eeeeekkkkks and Woowwwwwws” I had forgotten the feeling of complete unrestrained excitement and adrenaline that you get as a child. I travel to places like India, Vietnam, Korea. As much as it’s exciting, you’re on constant mental overdrive of language differences, culture differences, what and where to take transportation. New York was my Disneyland. It has the excitement that most western cities lack but is simple and easy. You can walk everywhere, you speak the same language, it has every nationality and every cuisine but it's all as exciting as a full on spider eating, tuk-tuk riding, backpack toting culture shock. Literally every main sight is within a few square miles of each other. We took one taxi in three days. As you fly in you see the statue of liberty out of the window. People dress perfectly but still look uber interesting and cool. Inner city parks are full of fashionistas walking pedigree pooches. Amazing deli sandwiches or perfect pizzas are never more than a few yards away and that Italian New Yorker accent is the huge juicy cherry on the cupcake that is Manhattan.








Shawn thought he wouldn’t really like it, he saw it as girl's paradise but in the end he really did. He loves zoos so we went to Central Park Zoo, he loved FAO Schwartz Toy shop and Times Square Toys are Us (this makes it seem like my boyfriend is 5) He wasn’t all that keen when I made him walk to the other end of Manhattan to visit Carrie’s house (Sex and the City character).

“Do we go into the house, is it like a museum?”
“No somebody lives there”
“Well what do you do then”
“You sit on her front steps and take a picture”
(eyes roll, deep sigh) “Ok…I see”








New Yorkers are a different breed. They notice quality a mile off. Shawn, who most of you will know, tends to dress in jeans, trainers and a polo shirt most days. He also however, wears his dad's very very expensive watch which nobody would ever realise was a very very expensive watch because it isn't paired with a suit and briefcase. About four people commented on his watch in New York just in passing on the street or in a shop.


Anyway we flew from there to Houston to stay with Shawn’s grandma for two weeks. Shawn’s Grandma is an interesting woman. She’s really lovely, she adores Shawn, but is possibly, the most depressing and negative person I have ever met. It was the human equivalent of spending a fortnight with Eyore and since which Pooh Bear and chums have gone up in my estimations. Shawn really does have the patience of a Saint and bends over backwards for her even though he rarely gets thanks. I think that this is lovely but when Shawn asked whether we could live in Houston so his Grandma could move in with us, I had to draw the line.








We left Houston late one night in a rented miniature red Toyota Yaris laden with the bulk of our life possessions and no room to swing a cat. We were the Beverly Hillbillies (but driving to Atlanta). We were warned pre-departure of places not to stop en-route as Shawn looks 'a bit foreign' and you don't want to take any risks in a tumbleweed, one horse towns. I had visions at this point of being chased out of town by one toothed bearded men with pitchforks, I wasn't quite sure if this was funny or not. Oh how vastly different this was to New York.



Now in my Hollywood obsessed brain, drunk on glitter, road trips are clearly, exactly like Thelma and Louise, minus the police chase and suicide. In my road trip dream, I am obviously wearing a head scarf, pair of Jackie O’s and halter neck dress, wind blowing through my hair, laughing loudly, gesticulating wildly at the joke that my Tom Cruise (in Top Gun- not now) look-alike sidekick just told.

In reality a road trip is nothing more than a long straight three lane road with dry dead grass along the side and the occasional Waffle house and Gas station dotted about for decoration. Unlike the dream, I'm wearing Pyjamas and a 'too much caffeine induced' crazed expression. The car rapidly filling up with empty wrappers. Similar tat rustles around my feet and sticks to my legs. Drinks holders containing empty coffee cups that have become makeshift bins. It’s bleak.





Driving through the very outskirts of Baton Rouge was the highlight of the trip where they had a Taco Bell. My recollection of the journey is simple-Texas took hours to get out of, Louisiana is one long bridge, Mississippi had a fair amount of road kill. Alabama does have a fun accent but not much else and by Georgia I couldn’t keep my eyes open so I’m not sure what was going on there.



However, the 13 hours we spent non stop driving was possibly the most polite time we have spent together since we first met. Shawn and I bicker like old women when we’re bored (I say ‘we’ but it’s mainly me, Shawn is far too placid for such caper) but in this situation, we were no fools. 13 hours in a Toyota Yaris would be hell on Earth if one or both of us had a cob on so we politely played 5 of Shawn’s songs followed by 5 of my songs, I knew the mapquest directions off by heart so not to be the unprepared ditsy co-pilot and we conversed about nice things like "would you like a sip of coffee?" "I wonder how the dog is" and "didn't your friends have a lovely kitchen". By the time we arrived we felt very Little House on the Prairie.

Arriving in Atlanta was heavenly. I seemed to be so exhausted at the time that I didn’t realise that Shawn’s Mom had the biggest house that I had ever stepped foot in. I just collapsed into a coma on the bed, after, of course, the obligatory eating of a mound of food (Our house is just a miniature Korea, complete with force feeding, If I have full hands, she force feeds me. I'm fois gras).






Since then, we have moved to a smaller house. Shawn's family are so lovely to me. His brother is the one that I natter to and gossip with and his sister is stunningly beautiful and the nicest person in the world. She is so very happy and friendly all the time. Shawn's 'Mom' insists that I call her Omma (mummy in Korean). I am very happy here although I do miss my family very very much and Skype is a blessing. Shawn's Mom is hilarious, she's always pronouncing things wrong. She heard Shawn swear the other day and clobbered him round the head shouting "wash your mouse, wash your mouse". Oh how I giggled at the image of Shawn with soap and a lathered up rodent.





So basically we are living in Atlanta. I am trying to get a visa and Shawn is looking for a job. We spend a lot of time fishing (more fun than I thought) and we have compromised about Shawn's Grandma in Houston by him visiting her every few months.



All this 24/7 time together seems to have fast tracked us to middle age. I took a brief reality check whilst sat in bed the other day. Shawn was in his woody Woodpecker ‘jamas and Deidre Barlow ‘post- contact lense removal’ speks, sporting a snazzy breathe right nosestrip whilst Ped-egging his feet. I was wittering inanely about not much in particular whilst listening to Julie Walter’s memoirs on audiobook and pairing up odd socks up into mildly matching couples. Hmmm sad oh so sad.

I have to go now because the women sat next to me have had an incident with a cup of coffee and a white suit and I, in my new middle aged way, have a Shout travel wipe in my bag that I need to fish out and save the day.

Much love everybody, I miss you very much
Em xxx

Ten- New Year New Country

Hi everyone,

Sorry for the rapid exit. We eventually got our flights booked twelve hours before we flew.

Thank you again to everyone who let us stay whilst we were in the UK- it was really nice to see everyone and it felt as though I spent better quality time with you all over 8 weeks than I would have done if I had been here all last year. Shawn had a really nice time and loved meeting you all.

We're currently in Boston and it's freezing. It's really, truly cold. I've even given in and allowed Shawn to wear his appalling puffa jacket. He's now in some mid nineties, Michelin man in a Ghetto kind of attire but overly grateful for the privilege.



So we stayed two nights in a hostel on Edgeware road, saw Natalie in Leicester square, went back to the hostel, packed, left at 4am, got train from Paddington to Heathrow, had a rubbery and overpriced fry up, Flew to Washington DC,(Shawn's birthplace, although I don't think he's been there since birth) transferred onto a flight to Newark, New Jersey, Got a train and a subway to Manhattan, walked the entire length of China town with four suitcases, one of which had wheels but no handle- riddle me that, stopped at Mc Donalds for sustenance, Ploughed on to The Fung Wah bus- China Town's answer to the ,Megabus, got harassed by a few homeless people (Excuse me darlin', do you know where China town is? Yes, it's here. I know- Just kidding ya) and finally at 8pm boarded the bus arriving into Boston at midnight where Shawn's brother picked us up to take us to a student apartment fully of untidy boys but nevertheless- paradise after all the moving around.





So yes 24 hours- four states and two countries.

Since we have been in Boston, we have ventured out rarely. One day we went on the freedom trail around Boston (so cold I nearly cried). We followed a red line along the pavement for a few hours with the aim of reaching Paul Reveers house, where everyone had said was a must to see. It was only as we stood outside Paul's gaffe that both Shawn and I admitted we had no idea who the chap was and as the place was closed anyway it had been- all in all- a pretty useless day. We filled the rest of the day with making silly poses with many a statue and monument around Boston- culture- phfttt.




We spent four days out in the countryside- at Shawn's aunt's house- real New England kind of stuff, huge wooden doll's house buildings painted eggshell blue and with bright shiny doors with winter wreaths on. It was beautiful. Shawn's Aunt and uncle built one of these houses for themselves, his uncle is an architect and designed a big bridge in Boston. Their house is beautiful and they have a labradoodle called Dakota who is so cute. We all cooked lobster together one night which was lovely. They had a spare Mustang lying around (as you do) and we drove around the coast one day- fearful of leaving the car for frostbite. Shawn let me drive around a car park which was hilarious as I tootled around like at the start and by the end had turned into toad of toad hall- whizzing around in figure of eights- parp parp!










New England seems monstrously normal compared with what I know of the US- Texas. As my dad pointed out the other day- any state that voted Obama would make an Englishman feel at ease. I do still get the curiosity towards my accent. One of the students is hourly upping the bid on how much he would pay for thirty seconds of me to constantly swear. Apparently profanity in a British accent is amusing.
So now we are about to spend two days in New Jersey with Shawn's Family before spending 2 days in Manhattan and flying on to Houston. I will write again in Houston.

Much Love as always
Emily
xxx

Nine- Day 365 of 365

Hello Everyone,

A year ago today I arrived in Korea petrified. For the first time in my life I wasn't a student. The " I don't think we're in Kansas anymore" moment hit the second the plane left Heathrow where I realised that from that point on I was going to see what I was made of without my world of family, friends and student loans.

I am still the youngest foreigner I have met in Korea and in retrospect it must have been a momentous second of madness when I decided one random Wednesday in May to go and live on my own on the other side of the world.


So how have I changed?


I don't believe that I have changed all that much since I was about three years old, I don't think anybody really does, I just got taller and had to deal with new experiences, but as far as life changing experiences go, this has been pretty influential. I can hear myself thinking a year ago "well I've traveled India and SE Asia this'll be a doddle", and yes, in that respect, Korea is so westernized and easy to adapt to. On the other hand, traveling in a different culture is entirely different to living in one.

It's been peaks and troughs of emotions. I realised early on that homesickness for me isn't so much missing people or things, It's just a desire for normality, just ten minutes of not having to think about how to say something in another language or how to get to a certain place without a map, just to be able to give my mind a rest. Somedays I've hated it, others I've never wanted to leave and in the end I've realised that where I used to out of politeness say "It's great" when asked "do you like korea?" I now say "I like it about as much as I like the UK".

What I do know for certain is that I've become very good friends with me,I'm not scared of my own company like I was before.
I know that I am stronger than I think I am and that I go into some autopilot mode when I'm upset.
I know that I am scarily organised and will meet myself coming back one day.
I know that wherever I am I need three types of people, one that makes me laugh, one that lets me cry and one that gets me out of the house.
I know that no matter how miserable I get, one call home will bring you right back down to earth remind you that your being too self obsessed and to suck it up.
I know that I have gone from not knowing what I'm doing to being a reasonably good EFL teacher.
I Know I will always be a little jealous of women with skinny legs.
I'm not as bad at learning languages as I thought and I can speak better Korean than I can any of the languages I learned in school and of this I am very proud.
I know that sometimes a lot more respect is gained by doing what's right rather than what pleases people.
I have met some of the most interesting people I've ever met and made friends for life in the most unlikely of people.







Korea

I know that this is a country of contradictions, facades and things I will never quite understand but as much as it grates on me sometimes at the end of the day I just think they add to this country's character and quirkiness, I've grown to love it and what was initially annoying now seems an somewhat orchestrated juxtaposition to add to the culture.

It's a place where a bad product comes beautifully packaged,
It's a place where respect is given based on profession and age rather than earned through quality of character.
Where the cheapest, fastest and most efficient public transport system I have ever encountered runs side by side to the worst road rage I could ever imagine.
It's a place where it's acceptable to turn up drunk to work- if you're a man.

It's where "women don't smoke"- but the restrooms are crammed with girls with Marlboro lights.
It's where prostitution is illegal but hostess bars where the girls might sleep with you after a few overpriced drinks is just "her prerogative"
It's where Buddhism meets Christianity meets Confucianism and results in a main course of gentility and love with a side of violence. I can't think of anywhere else where it is completely acceptable for a business man to beat his wife in the street or hit his child in the face with no worries that he will be judged or loose any respect.
Where a mans salary is asked on a first date.
and
It's where the penalties for marijuana and heroin equal.


However...


It's also where people are outwardly straight faced, emotionless and painfully strict on themselves while Inwardly they are one of the most generous, loving, healthy and happy people I have ever met.
It's Where Yakult and rice wine are cheaper than water- always a plus.
It has scenery that takes my breath away everyday. Going over the bridges at night to see the millions of neon lights right next to the beautiful mountains just miles outside the city centre gets me everytime.
The health and diet of people here puts our diet and nutrition to shame.
The children are well behaved, polite and a joy to teach.
The standard of living here is incredible.









Shawn


I know that my time here would be a completely different story were it not for Shawn and for what happened with him being arrested. I suddenly had to speak to lawyers in Korean, visit jails on my lunch break, find tens of thousands of dollars literally overnight. There's nothing like deportation papers to make one grow up. I went from being a new girlfriend to being a liaison officer between friends family and lawyers. I still can't believe all that happened. I still can't really believe he's out. It's one of those crazy stories you hear but until you're living in it you don't realise quite how mad it is. Trying to keep a relationship of 6 weeks going though 3 months of daily letter writing a one 7 min visit a week isn't ideal but somehow we made it work and somehow 7 months of us being together feels like 7 years and it has certainly brought us much closer together than we would have been without it. We're still appealing deportation of which it is 99% likely that we will loose but everything is much better now he is out on bail. He makes me very very happy and I am so glad that I met him regardless of all the emotional trauma he's caused me!



Most of all I know that this year has shoved me kicking and screaming into the real world and that the things I've grown most from have been the things that at the time I thought I couldn't deal with. I have no idea where in the world I will be living next year but I know that I will be much more confident to jump into it feet first the second time around.

But aside from all that, as far as real things go-

1 language + a plethora of shoes + 1 boyfriend + 1 dog - 22lbs - all debt = a year well spent me thinks.

I will be home On or around November 14th and in dire need of a fish finger butty some Vimto and good company.
Thank you everyone for reading my emails, responding to them, visiting me out here and keeping me informed of what's going on back home and encouraging me.

See you all soon

Much Love
Em x